#BigRonFilmReviews

An Expansion of the famous #BigRonFilmReviews twitter hashtag - because 140 characters is seldom enough.
My Hyperbole is my own, later to be contradicted and refuted.

Just ask man #FilmOfTheMonth Twitter Faceache Next page Archive

Cheech and Chong’s Up in Smoke (1978)
I recently watched How High and all the way through I was thinking “I wish I was rewatching Up in Smoke”…. so I did.
The misadventures couple of stoners on a search for weed that end up driving a van made of weed across the border with some hapless cops in pursuit.
It’s basic 70s stoner stuff with lots of “hey man” massive joints, dogshit smoking, Ajax snorting, several failed busts and a rock concert.
Still holds, up cracks me up and plenty quotable. Great stuff.
“Jeez, I hope your dick’s bigger than this, man.”
“You mean we’re smokin’ dog shit, man?”
“You just did the most acid I’ve ever seen anybody eat in my life!”
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Dogtown and Z-Boys (2001)
The Sean Penn narrated story of the Zephyr boys. The kids that blasted skateboarding into the 70s mainstream.
Loads of original stunt footage mixed with talking heads and black and white photography all set against a killer soundtrack of Jimi, Sabbath, Zz Top, Iggy, Rod Stewart etc.
Interesting counter culture origin, guys from the wrong side of the tracks and, surf moves were taken on the ground. It’s kind of perfect storm, these guys had the perfect environment of drought and steep hills and the ingenuity to exploit it.
These guys were essentially Rockstars, one of them even cameo’d in Charlie’s Angels, these guys had cash, fame and everything that went with it and in some cases went through some though times.
As documentaries go this one ranks pretty damn high on the coolometer and everyone should watch it.
“Two hundred years of american technology has unwittingly created a massive cement playground of unlimited potential. But it was the minds of 11 year olds what could see that potential.”
“Skaters by their very nature are urban guerrillas”
“Jay should’ve had it all, and it makes me so sad that he didn’t”.
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I Heart Huckabees (2004)
Any film that begins “Mother fucking cock sucker, Mother fucking shit fucker, what am I doing?” gets my interest pretty quickly.
Mental flick, almost feels like it might be a companion/homage piece to Wes Anderson’s Rushmore.
Schwartzman goes to bizarre ‘existential investigators’ Lily Tomlin and Dustin Hoffman (sporting a mega Beatles haircut) in a tale of bizarre self discovery and alternate therapy.
Wahlberg is brilliant as the mildly overzealous ‘Other’ with a Petroleum obsession and a habit of pushing over Jude Law and Naomi Watts goes truly insane.
Very strange, very clever, very different and importantly very enjoyable. I think it’s poking holes at the ludicrous things people to to find themselves, either that or promoting them. Either way if you want to see Schwartzman being suckled by Jude Law and Whalberg and Schwartzman hit each other in the face with a ball - this is that movie.
“Nobody sits like this rock sits. You rock, rock. The rock just sits and is”.
“God, what are you, a bitch? You’re a bitch. How many kids do you have, bitch?”
“FUCKABEES!”.
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I need to break the cycle…..

Shit. My last four films have been 21 and Over, Pervert, Match Point and Pimp.

I’m on a bad run here, probably watching I Heart Huckabees tonight - needs to be good.

#BigRonFilmReviews

Pimp (2010)
Terrible ‘Cockneys on coke’ offering set in the seedy soho sex industry in that faux documentary, handheld camera style that I pretty much hate.
We follow a pimp on a quest for a lost hooker trying to stay one step ahead of Chinese Triads, his foul-mouthed boss Danny Dyer and his psychotic brother.
The main guy is not too bad but Dyer as some kind of Kingpin is bloody awful and as for the attempt at humorous captions. No. Please no.
Racist, sexist, violent and offensive (and not in a good way). Poor writing and a story that’s done 1000% better in 8mm. Time for the Girl from Beaver Falls and and one of the Hobbits to get a new agent methinks.
“She’s got a bigger cock than me!”
“Nine men, me, and one shoe”.
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Match Point (2005)
Out goes intellectual New Yorkers and the Brooklyn Bridge in comes Snooty Posh Brits and Big Ben - fairly seamless really. No Woody in this one, instead we have Jonathan Rhys Meyers as a Tennis club Pro mixing with the upper classes.
Meyers’ social climbing Opera fan doing his very best Toff is a little uninspiring in this anti-love story, married to a new buddy’s sister but has his eye on his ex-Fiancée - talk about shitting on his own doorstep. Needless to say trists, affair and generally being a lying bastard causes nothing but heartache and the grass is seldom greener…..
Much more Cassandra’s Dream than Annie Hall, takes a few dark twists and turns but I much prefer his funny stuff, in honesty, I found this a little bit boring
“It’s 5 o’clock somewhere and i’ve got some serious cocktails to drink”
“Now Irish how about a little bit of Scottish before supper?”.
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I've found a cinematic showing of The MASTER!!!!!

Films

Holy Shit! Having dismally failed to make it to the Theatre and been reluctant to watch it on DVD i’ve only gone and found a showing in my hometown!!!

11am in the morning but who gives a flying fudge cake, I will make this happen.

#BigRonFiilmReviews

Pervert (2005)
What in God’s name was that? Loads of porn stars boobs, loads of sex and a Penis that detaches itself and kills people.
Fucking ridiculous.
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Indie Game (2012)
Great doc. A look at the world of Independent Video game creators. Extremely clever coding geeks with their own outlook and approach, game as an artform and a means of expression.
I focuses mainly on the creation of two platformy games, the fantastically named ‘Super Meat Boy’ and Fez and provides a look at the tension between former partners, internet trashing from fans and the pressure of hitting deadlines to gain exposure and the pitfalls of not.
Basic film making but extremely interesting. If you like gaming you’ll love it, you may well love it if you don’t too. Resonates with me as these guys, like me were bought up on Zelda, Mario and Punch Out… they took inspiration from that however - I work in Finance. Bugger.
“I made it for myself”.
“Fuck off! Jesus fucking christ”.
“The things I’ve sacrificed are social. You kind of have to give up something to have something great.”
“I would kill myseld”
“So meat boy is a boy made of meat”.
“He’ll be a millionaire because of me”.
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The Flicksation Podcast: The Flicksation Podcast: Episode #48 is up!

flicksation:

Eric, Ian, Robert, and Christian from the Third Act Podcast review and discuss the films THE COMPANY YOU KEEP, MUD, IRON MAN 3, UPSTREAM COLOR, and THE GREAT GATSBY. Lots of film news, and the “Who Wants to Screen a Millionaire?” feature.

Recent film and entertainment news items are…

21 and Over (2013)
Two chaps rock up to celebrate their buddy’s 21st the day before a life changing career interview… carnage and mayhem ensues.
Next to no plot just ninety minutes of Knob-socks, beer, bums, swearing, pissing, puking, guns, general idiocy and casual racism in a series of far fetched mishaps.
There’s an underlying commentary on lost friendships and failing to live up to expectations which may have been interesting but it’s more about the beer chugging, jumping off roofs and evading bulls.
Think Project X with one of the guys from Project X but a little lighter hearted.
These guys party pretty damn hard, kids might love it, it made me smile a little and i’d have a beer with them but does it make for a good movie? Not really.
“Can we cool it with the Sister fucking?”
“No Rapey, no Rapey”.
“I’ll fucking cry for you”.
“Dude, we just circumcised Jeff Chang”.
#BigRonFilmReviews

The Hangover 3 (2013)

Ok. They played this trail before Start Trek yesterday. Now I HATED The Hangover 2, surely i’m not going to waste my time watching 3? Am I?

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Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)
JJ Abrams I think you’ve turned me I to a Trekkie.
The maverick Kirk upsets a few characters (including Robocop) and loses the Enterprise but when Sherlock attacks Star Fleet it’s up to Kirk, Spock and the gang to save the day. Cue lots of action, cool science, a few laughs, a couple of surprises and some clever stuff with Blood.
And it is excellent.
A splendid balance of drama, action, huge effects and crucially for me humour. Gone is the campy Shatner stuff, replaced by cool sexy slickness and even a couple of swearbombs.
I could totally hang out in the world of the future, huge futuristic buildings with the Golden Gate Bridge and the London Eye poking round the corner and apparently there are still dives to drink in too.
Brilliant casting, to a man a perfect fit for the previous actors, Pine Fantastic, Quinto 100% Vulcan, Eve and Saldana sexy, Harald from Harald and Kumar is splendid as Sulu and Urban kicks out a couple of corking lines as Bones. Cumberbatch steals the show as the villan of course and is truly wonderful.
My only nitpick would be the failure to end at a certain (natural) end point so it maybe hung around ten minutes too long… but I forgive it. Highly recommended.
“Mr Sulu remind me never to Piss you off”“I will walk over your cold corpses to get to them”.
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Army of Darkness (1992)
You’re everyday tongue in cheek medieval time travel horror.
One armed maniac Bruce Campbell is transported back to medieval times, only by defeating an army of evil can he find the Necronomicon and get home.
Loads of weird stuff, hammy effects, books with teeth, rubber monsters, even evil mini Bruces and a double head to contend with - all very good fun.
I’ve never really watched much of the early Raimi stuff, if it’s all like this it might pretty decent.
“Well hello Mr Fancy Pants”.
“First you wanna kill me, now you wanna kiss me”.
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Best Revenge in a Movie?

The Skin I live In or Oldboy? Got to be two of the best and most unique i’ve ever seen.

Any more offers?

#BigRonFilmReviews